Each Tuesday morning for nearly three years, I have received a call from Paul Byers asking, “Do you need me today?” He always liked to check in before officially reporting for duty as an administrative volunteer for our Aultman Hospice program.
Today is Tuesday, but this morning, I received a call from our nurse to inform our team that Paul had died early this morning. He was receiving care from Aultman Hospice.
Paul became a volunteer for Aultman Hospice in 2007. His wife, Norma, died in our hospice program a year prior to his attending the Aultman Hospice volunteer training program. I can honestly say that I had an instant admiration and respect for Paul. He tearfully expressed his desire to “return in some way the help that he received from Aultman Hospice when Norma was terminally ill.”
When the training was complete, he realized that he was still actively grieving the loss of his wife but had a strong desire to honor her and be a part of our hospice team. He graciously accepted my offer to assist us directly with administrative duties in the office.
Paul performed a variety of duties as a volunteer. He assisted with mailings, filing, copying, computer work and even wrapping Christmas presents for our Adopted Family. He did all of these things with a joyful spirit and quiet purpose. On two memorable occasions, we received a call on a Tuesday morning to let us know that Paul would “need to report off.” He wanted to know if he we could bring the work to him so it would be sure to get done. On both of those occasions, he was calling us from the hospital. On one occasion, he had suffered a small stroke, and on the other, he had just had a kidney removed.
Paul possessed a quiet and genuine kindness and compassion for those around him. He had an enormous smile. It wasn’t long before he formed a friendship with his fellow administrative volunteers. Paul was the foundation of our “Tuesday crew.” One by one these volunteers arrived at hospice Tuesday after learning Paul had died earlier that morning. He would be so honored that they chose to work together for hospice with the sense of meaning and purpose that had become so important to him. All of us sense his absence and have had many moments of reflection.
His love for his wife, Norma, was remarkable. Paul was passionate about many things: God, his wife, his family and sports. He spoke of his sons — Patrick, Randy and Terry — not only with a father’s love but with a true respect. He was so proud of the men they have become. He cherished their wives and adored his grandchildren.
It has been said in so many eloquent ways that as one life touches another, a rippling effect occurs that impacts many. Paul was so humble in regard to what he would consider a very small act of kindness or gift of service his volunteering was to our hospice program. I don’t know if he truly understood the impact he had on our team members.
I had the privilege of sitting with Paul a few days before he died. Although he was not able to respond to me with words, I was able to thank him for his acts of service. More importantly, I explained to him how much he has touched my life and all of those around him. I told him that he had set the bar at its highest point for the type of man, husband and father it is possible to be. I told him that he had been a part of our hospice team first as a caregiver to his wife, then as a volunteer, and, most importantly, as our friend.
This morning, we were sharing our memories of Paul as a hospice team. In the distance could be heard the undeniable quiet, gentle song of a mourning dove. Its song provided a comforting presence that seemed to honor our beloved volunteer, Paul Byers.
In memory of Paul Byers, 84, of Canton
In lieu of flowers, the family of Paul Byers asks that donations be made to Aultman Hospice, 2821 Woodlawn Ave., Canton, Ohio 44708.
A hospice volunteer requires nothing more than to be of service. Like Paul, many volunteers will be honored this coming week as we celebrate Hospice Volunteer Appreciation week and they will all say, "I received more than I gave". I hope this gentleman knew how much he was appreciated, and I bet he did.
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